Firelight eyes inset with oceans
Turbulent with quests unspoken
Smoldering as sleep attempts to
Douse the blaze and creep within you
Drowning in the chaos of a torn and broken world
Like the closest thing to heaven that the earth may ever hold
Cradled in the moment we were effortlessly curled
Into pretty little bundles–we were burning up like candles
Ravenous hearts with words unspoken
Chancy glances passed and stolen
Overbold and wildly woven
So in love, but love was broken
Your rhymes are always so easy, flawless and natural. Such a difficult thing to master.
Thank you. I am too impatient to make them long and complicated. I still nurture hopes of writing a book one day, but my attention span is my bane π
You are very good as you are. please don’t make them long and complicated. Sweet and simple goes straight to the heart.
Thank you so much! I’m glad you don’t mind small doses π
So enchanting but sad also.
Loved it!
Thank you!
How you manage to get the complex to the simple to the complex; I have just wander along…stolen glance is one of my favorite thoughts; I love the ways you get at this!
Your comments are always so encouraging π
Thank you!
I love how you write, VW, I find it so intense!
That is quite a compliment. I feel privileged to share it with you!
Beautifully woven and written why are fate and love so fickle!
I don’t know but if you find out let me know π
I love this π you write so well, it just flows like magic π
Thank you very much, Autumn!
love this poem, its beautiful…. π
Thanks for reading!
Thank you for your poetry. Tell me about what you were thinking when you wrote this?
Thank you! I was thinking about a wonderful love. I heard a song by The Juliana Theory a long time ago in which he referred to a girl as “the closest thing to heaven” and the idea was fascinating to me. I also had the thought from Edgar Allan Poe’s “Annabelle Lee” in my head where he said that the reason his love was taken was because the angels coveted a love like they had so she was taken away. I don’t really know what all else was going through my head. I just felt like there was a wonderful relationship there and it was not the fault of the people involved that it could not work out correctly–rather it was something more like the world they were in which prevented it. I’m not sure any of this makes sense. Sometimes my thoughts are a bit abstract and odd
Wow such insight. It is delightful to hear you describe the thoughts that brought you to the poem. Lovely poem as well.
Thank you Lydia. I can’t say I always have a clear explanation for why I think or write what I do, but if I do, I don’t mind sharing! π
So I think I remembered the song lyrics wrong. They were “the closest thing to perfect” not heaven. But that just means my idea is more original now right? π
Of course. π it makes more sense than you know. It’s a lovely poem and wonderful thought. Thank you for telling me.
beautiful..cradled in the moment
Thank you π
I would only repeat what others have said, so I’m just going to say this is simply beautiful; an elegant expression of ending love~
Thank you very much! I’m always happy to hear your opinions π
You just keep impressing me with every post! Love it, honestly. I know I seem like the over-friendly stalker here but your words truly speak to me. Great job!
I’ve never been popular enough to have stalkers, so I’m sure even if you were it would be flattering π
I really appreciate your thoughts and ideas! I am humbled by your kindness. Thank you for sharing with me
Thank you.
I was unaware I did anything that would fetch such gratitude π
“Firelight eyes inset with oceans
Turbulent with quests unspoken
Smoldering as sleep attempts to
Douse the blaze and creep within you
Drowning in the chaos of a torn and broken world
Like the closest thing to heaven that the earth may ever hold
Cradled in the moment we were effortlessly curled
Into pretty little bundlesβwe were burning up like candles
Ravenous hearts with words unspoken
Chancy glances passed and stolen
Overbold and wildly woven
So in love, but love was broken”
π thank you
Passionate VW…
Thanks π
Beautifully written once again, VW. And I would echo what everyone else here has said!
Thank you for the echo π
It is always encouraging to hear that it was enjoyed and appreciated π
So in love, but love was broken…. very intense and deep …. I am amazed with the lines and also wondering where the emotions came? ….. just asking ….. π
You are always more than welcome to ask, although I fumble with explanations π
The feeling in that line came from the idea that if you attempt to use something properly, and your procedures are correct, then when things do not work as promised, perhaps it is not you who is failing, but the product is faulty. Perhaps there is a certain frustration involved in that statement as I feel that I have given all there is to give on my end and so has everyone else involved. Then I want to lay the blame somewhere else. I don’t blame the people. I am forced to blame love itself. Absurd perhaps, but artists twist things to pull the emotions out and I needed to express a frustration over a very wonderful love that had been torn apart by circumstances outside of my control. Then again love rarely works as advertised on TV π
Great poem again! Somehow the last sentence resonated the most for me “So in love, but love was broken”
Just thinking about even after a love is broken it still became a part of who we are and maybe it never leaves. Anyway…
That’s true. It never really leaves. Our identity is formed by successes and scars
Beautiful poet you are.
π your words are very uplifting. Thank you