
“it hurts” she tells me with a sense of acute emotion. A twisted wince and shudder brought on by, well, just life I guess. I stop to wonder why is it that at the first sign of pain it’s our natural reaction to digress. But I suppose that’s instinct for you. Survival and all. Keeping the race alive and helping us to reproduce. I do find it difficult to swallow the paradigm of just living and making babies because thats what people do. See, I think inside of us each somewhere there is a spark waiting to fly. A fire that could erupt if we ever let it go. And we want to. We really want to live with that sort of passion but we’re scared of all the things we don’t know. I’m sure the first fire started without man’s intervention. Probably lightening or some act of God, but then the people wanted fire and they fought to create it. They tried new techniques until finally one of them caught. I’m sure the first time they struck two flint stones together and ignited it people were astounded and that’s all well, but while they warmed themselves around their newly developed passion did anyone stop to ask about how the stones felt? I doubt it. Why would they? Rocks don’t have feeling. You just use them until they break and then get a new set. But people…well, we are different, but it still requires friction to get us fired up–and it’s the reactions you get like: “it hurts”. Well, yeah. Of course it hurts to find out you’ve been broken into pieces and your burning from the inside out. But in a way perhaps our lives are like a fire. We don’t last very long but we live better when we’re brighter. And, in the end, the ones who never caught a spark may have missed out on the friction but their living in the dark. Emotions aren’t for hiding and a the fires aren’t for fighting. The pain is just the process and it’s nothing that should seem frightening. after all, without a little pain we would never end up stronger. If you don’t ever stand up then you will never stand up longer. If you refuse to suffer you will never learn to heal. If you refuse the senses you will never learn to feel. If you run from everything you will always be alone. And if you run from yourself then you will never feel at home. If you can’t take the weather you will never feel the rain. If you plan to get the pleasure you will need to endure some pain. If you think life is supposed to be about always feeling happy. You will wake up one day realizing you really don’t have anything. See life is not about it all just falling into place. Life is hard to calculate and it gets in your face. If you want to be better then you’d better find out who you are. And if you want to burn brighter then don’t be scared of all the sparks.
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